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18.02.2010 .... Blue Morgue

I changed the layout according to my current mood. Well, to be frank, I wanted to make it dark and beautiful at first, but I realized I had my hopes up too high, seeing that my graphics skill is equal/lower than that of fresh starters. I will just stick to the rule of simplicity. I baptized this layout as 'blue morgue' since I decided to change the whole atmosphere of my blog in middle of making it. Why blue morgue? Simple. This is how I feel- I feel like I am wrapped in thick layers of cobwebs that I cannot take off no matter how hard I try. Even if I manage to rip through the layers, I find myself in an empty darkness where I cannot help but feel the imaginary chills.

Cold like a dead.

If it feels like a dead, then I guess it is that I am in either grave or morgue, right?

I am not dead. Yet.

Grave gives me the feeling of eternal rest and peace.

In contrast, morgue makes me feel the empty coldness that penetrates even the thickest bone of mine.

And right in the centre, I am alone.

This is a morgue.

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What a great word morgue is! Praise those who manage to endure being in such coldness!

Alright, I'll stop being all ambiguious and strange. But strangeness is what I am, I am strange.

Hate myself. I must be going crazy again. I tell people that I am honest and outspoken kind of person, but I confess, I am not being honest with myself. I truly don't know what I want. I just want to cry the world away and forget about everything until there is nothing but I, alone, in darkness. Wouldn't that be nice and quiet? Is it a great sin to wish for a moment of peace and comfort? How come I am granted no such thing?

P.s: I made a new page called, 'Take Away'. I will put things for you visiting ducklings to take away and keep for youself here... To take or not, it's your choice. I also put two avatars I am using for my own blog on there, so you can use them if you want. You know the usual rules for using graphics off other sites, right? Just don't make me repeat that shit.

[EDIT]Loads of gratitude goes to Akita Neru! Her song, 'Fireflies' gave my heart some comfort. It's a lovely song that makes me think of my old house and all that childhood memories. I will put the link to the song on the 'Music' page.[/EDIT]

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08.02.2010 .... Short update

This is a short update. I changed the layout to an iframe! I think it's so much easier to use...

I'm going out for volunteer work later in the afternoon. Argh.

Will post later.

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26.01.2010 .... IMVU & Facebook

I am going to join IMVU- it's a site where you can hang out and meet people, custom your own avatar, and blog, though the "homepage" is kind of ugly. I've been around trying to chat with strangers, though so far, I haven't met a descent person who can type longer than "cool", "lol", "yeah". Well, there's this cool person who is training to become a fire fighter, though he seems to find chatting a bit awkward.

Anyways!
It's been 2 weeks since I joined Facebook, and guess what? Old mates! It's so good to see them well. I know, I am the bad sort of person who never keeps in contact, but I do, out of blue, sent e-mails. Sometimes, when e-mails return, this is when I thought that I had lost contact with people forever! Thanks to Facebook, I found my old friends¢¾

I don't really intend to use Facebook that often, though I will use it to keep in contact only with my old mates. So don't ask for my e-mail address! lol

Anyone who has IMVU account, tell me! :D

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31.12.2009 .... The end is drawing nearer...

Sadly, the end to 2009 is drawing nearer. Only 3 hours later, we all will be entering the new phase of 2010. Only if I could back the time and restart the year.... No, I wish I could stop the time. That would be convenient. Then I will be able to enjoy the moments of happy memories over and over again, and I will never be sick of it.

Only if...

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25.12.2009 .... Moving!

Alright! After I'm finally done with the revamp, I'm moving out! :)
I'm not sure where I'm moving to, but I'll let everyone know soon!

Today's X-mas! I forgot! So much for it. @__@ I appreciate the holiday and everything, but for being an atheist, I guess it's not the sort of the holiday I should celebrate. Unlike the days back in Germany, I haven't got things for people here. People here don't celebrate X-mas in a way Catholics and Protestants do. To them, X-mas is like... a day to spend shopping in X-mas mood or staying with their boy/girl friends. :P At least, it does for me. XD

I hope everyone has a nice X-mas to rest like me! LOL

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24.12.2009 .... Finally back home!

I'm finally back home! The school has let us out only after we finished the 6th period. :( This is all because we missed some classes due to the influenza and some stupid parents decided to go ask the principal for refund on the missed classes. I had to go to school on X-mas eve! Plus, we get to go on vacation not until the 31st! I guess there's no point in waiting for winter holidays because I'll have to go to school to take supplementary lessons. All Korean high school students have to. I have no choice. T__T

Anyway, it's so good to see my old house and my adorable puppy, Mike! He is usually lazy and I still do remember how he used to flop his tails a few times before going back to sleep when I came home. But things have been different in 2 years- I am now away from home and come home biweekly that when he sees me, he goes berserk. I have never seen him so happy to see me! I love my dog <3

Ma and I did some grocery shopping. I wanted to buy some salted ham, but again, Ma's been nagging me for living on unhealthy food. I've been eating well this year, 2009, and I am assured that I have got much better. One flaw is that I haven't been excercising. I gained some weight, but I grew! I'm taller than my friends. LOL

One more... I've been watching news, and I am extremely disgusted at the way japanese goverment is treating the old ladies they have dragged to japanese armies to "console" the soldiers. Trash that "consoling", they've been savagely and viciously raped by those soldiers! Imagine, how would you feel if you were taken to the war, raped by 5 men a day, starved, made to live in a pigsty, and freed only to be shunned and shamed? Korea and the Koreans have never received any proper compensations, let along apologies!

Do you know what japanese government gave to these old ladies? They gave measly 99 yen, which is like, less than 1 dollar. Vicious, horrifying monsters! No offense, I like the culture, but I abhor japan's history, government, and its false pride. I wonder what they have to find pride in?

After the World War 2, Germany has payed its price for starting the war, and the people of Deutschland have deeply resented and regretted what they have done and supported. But what about the japanese? japanese government actually chose to distort and twist the facts in the textbooks used in schools! They dared to re-write the history. They have brain-washed the growing children of japan. They disgust me.

Koreans are sensitive about the history, especially the history between late 19th century and 21st. The most sensitive of all is when japanese dominated the Korean peninsula. The more and more japan acts for its selfish and useless pride, and lie, the more anger they will create among the Koreans. It would be alright if it's only anger, but it's becomming hatred, no, abhorrence. The government of japan, along with the people, must make official apologies and compensations for what Korea has been through. If they do not, they will continue to be hostile against each other.

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13.11.2009 .... HeartDrops.ORG

I was surfing internet and came across Heart Drops. I was rather shocked after reading tips on making websites. I didn't know there was actually someone who payed close attention to things like linking affiliates as x. I did find them inconvenient, and perhaps, annoying, but never did I give it any attention- I chose to ignore and forget. I know that I don't link my affiliates/blog buddies/link exchanges on every pages of my site but that's only because my layout doesn't have space for them. I guess I'll have to change my layout as soon as possible. :P Yeah! Talking about layouts, one more thing I found out was that leaving a huge gap on either side of the layout looks ugly. Alright, I'll do something about that as well. XP

What more have I learnt from this site? Commenting on affiliates & blog buddies! If I am to use the comment box on their blog entry, never post any message unrelated to the entry. And... I guess that's it? These were the new things I have learnt, and the rest was what I already knew. But still, I found them really helpful! Anyone, even those with amazing sites, should read it and confirm what they have and haven't been doing.

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